Last night, as I was watching the USA National Team game, I happened to see that the next screen over at the bar was this year's Wisconsin/Ohio State game that made Braxton Miller famous. By this time, the USA game was well over (it was never really a game to begin with). Even though, I'm quite sure everyone at the bar had already watched this particular football game (and some probably over and over). However, when the moment came for Miller to make his running pass that would catapult him to prominence, everyone focused on a single screen, and anyone who talked was instantly glared at. As Devin Smith caught the ball, the entire bar erupted in cheers and applause 9 months and many replays later.
Even though I have written about this before a lot, it never fails to surprise me. The community here depends so much on football. When I first started at Ohio State, I hated this fact. That Ohio State was defined by its football. As I have lived here for four years now, I have begun to see that perhaps the relationship is a little more complex. That perhaps, while it is football that (sadly) brings us together, it is the people that make up the community. This undoubtedly creates a fanboy collection; however, this is found everywhere, and I certainly do not see myself turning into one anytime soon.
Friday, July 13, 2012
Monday, January 16, 2012
Endings
As I start approaching the inevitable end of my college experience, it is only appropriate to take a slight look open. On the eve of my next step forward, I spent most of my day and night relaxing, but also review the past three years. However; this entry is not to lament the past, but to cherish the journey that I have traveled, and the light at the end of the road.
I can say that I am very happy to be reaching the city limits of where I will be eventually exiting. Over the next few weeks, I will be calling many people and traveling to different places. Even just a few months before, I would have never imagined this. That the ending that I seek is in the final straight stretch. No more long winding turns to make. The path of college is beginning to become less forked for the first time since three years ago.
Short and sweet, plus this was super meaningful. I like it.
I can say that I am very happy to be reaching the city limits of where I will be eventually exiting. Over the next few weeks, I will be calling many people and traveling to different places. Even just a few months before, I would have never imagined this. That the ending that I seek is in the final straight stretch. No more long winding turns to make. The path of college is beginning to become less forked for the first time since three years ago.
Short and sweet, plus this was super meaningful. I like it.
Wednesday, January 4, 2012
New Years and a New Beginning
So there are multiple advantages to posting one's Resolutions online. They are easy to access, and along those lines, it is easy for people to pressure you into sticking or doing them (at least, the "perception" of this is also very strong). While I tend not to make these because they may make me sad when I don't do them all (like several from last year), there's always hope for a better year right? I actually wasn't too bad last year. I hit 3 out of the 4 or 5 that I set for myself.
1. Keep my room clean: I am not a slob. At least, I don't consider myself one. While filling out the college roommate form, I marked myself as cluttered (defined as: having lots of stuff, but organizing them in a particular way). I am hoping; however, that attention to little things such as keeping my desk clear or making my bed every morning, will be encourage the development of a more organized lifestyle. I try pretty hard at this actually, Evernote and my meticulously designed folder system in Gmail and on my computer are testaments to this, but I find that my anal attentiveness has its limits.
2. Give a compelling argument to graduate schools: There are many things that I cannot control anymore, my GRE scores, my letters of recommendation, my GPA (for the most part), but there are things that I can still control. My goal this year is to submit the remaining applications to the best of my abilities. Naturally this resolution also includes getting into graduate school.
3. Qualify for the Boston Marathon: This has been my goal throughout college, but one that has evaded me during the last three and a half years. Throughout the last three years, I had spent my time building up both my physical strength and confidence to train and prepare for a marathon with a qualifying goal time. This past summer, all my efforts came to a shattering halt when I got hurt during my first 20 mile run. After spending most of my fall on recovering, cross-training and mentally resting, I find myself ready to once again chase my dream. My target marathon is the Cleveland Marathon, and my target time is anything quicker than 3 hours.
4. Enjoy the rest of senior year: So far this academic year has been filled with solidifying my closest friendships in college, especially with those who are grades below me. Given my enduring friendship with the group that I graduated high school with, I would say that spending time and enjoying the rest of my senior year with my closest friends is pretty important and defining.
5. A new hobby: A conscious decision that I made during the summer of my freshmen year was to consolidate what I devoted my time to. During the last three years, I have faithfully stuck to that decision. Despite several attempts during sophomore year to reach out, I maintained four core areas: school, research, volunteering and running. One of the biggest parts of my life that got cut during college was a creative hobby. After dabbling in a couple of "failed" creative projects during sophomore and junior year, I find myself wanting to try again in this area. While I occasionally finger at the piano while I am at home, I find it difficult to steal a practice room in the music department. Additionally, I already recognize that it will be very hard for me to return to my previous level of devotion. I hope that this year, I can find something to replace this former love of mine.
On a semi-related note: I discovered a new website, Thought Catalogue, that I really like. I found it from a friend's post. The article that I read incidentally was about New Year's Resolutions. Needless to say, I thought very highly of the post and am now addicted to this site. Check it out!
1. Keep my room clean: I am not a slob. At least, I don't consider myself one. While filling out the college roommate form, I marked myself as cluttered (defined as: having lots of stuff, but organizing them in a particular way). I am hoping; however, that attention to little things such as keeping my desk clear or making my bed every morning, will be encourage the development of a more organized lifestyle. I try pretty hard at this actually, Evernote and my meticulously designed folder system in Gmail and on my computer are testaments to this, but I find that my anal attentiveness has its limits.
2. Give a compelling argument to graduate schools: There are many things that I cannot control anymore, my GRE scores, my letters of recommendation, my GPA (for the most part), but there are things that I can still control. My goal this year is to submit the remaining applications to the best of my abilities. Naturally this resolution also includes getting into graduate school.
3. Qualify for the Boston Marathon: This has been my goal throughout college, but one that has evaded me during the last three and a half years. Throughout the last three years, I had spent my time building up both my physical strength and confidence to train and prepare for a marathon with a qualifying goal time. This past summer, all my efforts came to a shattering halt when I got hurt during my first 20 mile run. After spending most of my fall on recovering, cross-training and mentally resting, I find myself ready to once again chase my dream. My target marathon is the Cleveland Marathon, and my target time is anything quicker than 3 hours.
4. Enjoy the rest of senior year: So far this academic year has been filled with solidifying my closest friendships in college, especially with those who are grades below me. Given my enduring friendship with the group that I graduated high school with, I would say that spending time and enjoying the rest of my senior year with my closest friends is pretty important and defining.
5. A new hobby: A conscious decision that I made during the summer of my freshmen year was to consolidate what I devoted my time to. During the last three years, I have faithfully stuck to that decision. Despite several attempts during sophomore year to reach out, I maintained four core areas: school, research, volunteering and running. One of the biggest parts of my life that got cut during college was a creative hobby. After dabbling in a couple of "failed" creative projects during sophomore and junior year, I find myself wanting to try again in this area. While I occasionally finger at the piano while I am at home, I find it difficult to steal a practice room in the music department. Additionally, I already recognize that it will be very hard for me to return to my previous level of devotion. I hope that this year, I can find something to replace this former love of mine.
On a semi-related note: I discovered a new website, Thought Catalogue, that I really like. I found it from a friend's post. The article that I read incidentally was about New Year's Resolutions. Needless to say, I thought very highly of the post and am now addicted to this site. Check it out!
Monday, January 2, 2012
Lots of Food and New Things
Definitely one of the best vacations I've had in a very long time. The improper grammar should be an indication of its greatness. So without further ado, here is a sneak peak!
Somehow, my mom, brother and I managed to persuade my dad to go on a cruise for Christmas (with all the other family friends of course). The one vacation that had evaded my family (a couple of us are particularly prone to motion-sickness) was finally within grasps. After suffering through the long drive to Miami, we got on the cruise with just enough time to spare.
Almost immediately after getting onto the cruise, I started to eat, which resulted in this:
Fast forward through a safety drill, and I watched one of my first sunsets in a very long time:
Dinner was quite impressive, and my Mahi Mahi tasted really good. Fortunately, I didn't know that I could order multiples of things (which lead to delicious overeating of desert the next few nights), so I only ordered one dish from each course. That night I desperately tried to catch up on reading Brisingr (probably the only time, I have for casual reading).
The second morning, my brother and I spent most of our day in Nassau, Bahamas. There we snorkeled (picture way above is the water there). Snorkeling was so much fun; I'm definitely buying some equipment before next time. After a quick nap while everyone else was running around trying to find things to do, we went to dinner, where my brother promptly decided to stuff himself (2 entree dishes). The comedy show after dinner, was the greatest case of a mix bag performance ever. Trying to occupy our time afterwards, our group decided to play Mafia. However, the effort to demonstrate to our parents how to play the game quickly turned south and quickly reminded me why I rarely play games with my parents.
The third day, we went to a private beach (I can't believe cruise lines own their own islands).
After deciding to sleep in on Christmas for the first time in who knows how many years, I finally got up at around 10, thanks to my persistent alarm (my mom). A quick breakfast, and my family and I were on the tender heading towards the island. The sand on the island was so clean and soft compared to the hard, gritty sand in Michigan. Besides burying my brother in the sun a couple of times, I also had a healthy dose of sun, snorkeling, turkey burgers and sleep. Dinner was fine as always, and our final night was filled with a surprisingly good Christmas show (the singers were really good). After the show, my friends and I sat out on the deck and played board games. It was so nice and peaceful; I miss it already. Overall, it was a wonderful trip, and you can bet that I'll be going on more.
Somehow, my mom, brother and I managed to persuade my dad to go on a cruise for Christmas (with all the other family friends of course). The one vacation that had evaded my family (a couple of us are particularly prone to motion-sickness) was finally within grasps. After suffering through the long drive to Miami, we got on the cruise with just enough time to spare.
Almost immediately after getting onto the cruise, I started to eat, which resulted in this:
Dinner was quite impressive, and my Mahi Mahi tasted really good. Fortunately, I didn't know that I could order multiples of things (which lead to delicious overeating of desert the next few nights), so I only ordered one dish from each course. That night I desperately tried to catch up on reading Brisingr (probably the only time, I have for casual reading).
The second morning, my brother and I spent most of our day in Nassau, Bahamas. There we snorkeled (picture way above is the water there). Snorkeling was so much fun; I'm definitely buying some equipment before next time. After a quick nap while everyone else was running around trying to find things to do, we went to dinner, where my brother promptly decided to stuff himself (2 entree dishes). The comedy show after dinner, was the greatest case of a mix bag performance ever. Trying to occupy our time afterwards, our group decided to play Mafia. However, the effort to demonstrate to our parents how to play the game quickly turned south and quickly reminded me why I rarely play games with my parents.
The third day, we went to a private beach (I can't believe cruise lines own their own islands).
After deciding to sleep in on Christmas for the first time in who knows how many years, I finally got up at around 10, thanks to my persistent alarm (my mom). A quick breakfast, and my family and I were on the tender heading towards the island. The sand on the island was so clean and soft compared to the hard, gritty sand in Michigan. Besides burying my brother in the sun a couple of times, I also had a healthy dose of sun, snorkeling, turkey burgers and sleep. Dinner was fine as always, and our final night was filled with a surprisingly good Christmas show (the singers were really good). After the show, my friends and I sat out on the deck and played board games. It was so nice and peaceful; I miss it already. Overall, it was a wonderful trip, and you can bet that I'll be going on more.
Saturday, December 17, 2011
Growing Up
As I prepare my end-of-the year budgeting audit for my parents, I have once again realized that I have spent way more money than I have made and must once again depend on my parents to settle everything. I hate that I cannot be self-sufficient, especially when my parents have already provided unlimited support for me. I used to be such a good kid. I always did what my parents told me to do, frugal, worked hard. I defined the typical Asian boy. Now fast forward even just a few years, on the brinks of growing up, graduating and being on my own, I still have yet to master the small things like how to talk to people, how to manage my finances or study hard on my own, let alone figure out a realistic future for myself. Furthermore, throughout the last two years, I have (mostly) freely skipped out on what my dad refers to as the number one social obligation of an Asian. While this is definitely a story for another time, I think in hindsight, he'd probably be glad, as that obligation comes at great costs, especially with the people I tend to meet it seems. Oh whoops semi-sidetracked.
Ok back to the original post topic. Sometimes it seems like I have spent the last three years regressing. On my own, I formed some pretty bad habits, that I spent much of this year fighting and "reprogramming". But despite these changes, I still find myself falling behind what I use to be and what I wanted myself to become. Perhaps, nothing hits as hard as looking at the college plans I had for myself when I entered freshman year. They were goals that were seemingly simple: run the Boston Marathon, do well in school/get into medical school, be happy and a few others. Through the last year, I knew that I would be sitting here today, not matching all of those goals. At least at that time, I had the delusion/plan to salvage parts of my plan/list of goals for college. Now a year later, I am more keen on the realities of my world and probable future.
This is generally not how you want to end things (research has shown that the emotion attached to the end of an experiences has an overwhelming effect its perception later), but I guess this is what I have. If you say I should look towards the future and a new year, I may never talk to you again. This is not being sad or depressed (clinical term, not to be used lightly), but a reality of what the last three years and a half years have been from an objective standpoint.
Ok back to the original post topic. Sometimes it seems like I have spent the last three years regressing. On my own, I formed some pretty bad habits, that I spent much of this year fighting and "reprogramming". But despite these changes, I still find myself falling behind what I use to be and what I wanted myself to become. Perhaps, nothing hits as hard as looking at the college plans I had for myself when I entered freshman year. They were goals that were seemingly simple: run the Boston Marathon, do well in school/get into medical school, be happy and a few others. Through the last year, I knew that I would be sitting here today, not matching all of those goals. At least at that time, I had the delusion/plan to salvage parts of my plan/list of goals for college. Now a year later, I am more keen on the realities of my world and probable future.
This is generally not how you want to end things (research has shown that the emotion attached to the end of an experiences has an overwhelming effect its perception later), but I guess this is what I have. If you say I should look towards the future and a new year, I may never talk to you again. This is not being sad or depressed (clinical term, not to be used lightly), but a reality of what the last three years and a half years have been from an objective standpoint.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
Plans and Expectations
For some reason I keep on coming back to this one one blog. It's the one that I started with during the beginning of college. It's also the that has all of the joys and pains from all three years catalogued in one consolidated place. Perhaps, I'll archive it one day soon, and start over during the summer when I (hopefully) go to graduate school. Speaking of social networks I also started a Tumblr account, which I had originally designed to post a picture of everyday remaining of senior year, but so far that I haven't been able to contribute to it as frequently as I liked. Unfortunately, Finals has taken a toll on my time even in general.
So for the deeper meaning part of the entry:
This has been one of the worst weeks in quite a while. From a psychological perspective, I should probably wait until the end of the week to write this, after I've had some time to unwind and hang out with friends (end-experience perception, first explained in pain psychology); however, as I sit and fix my friend's computer, I find myself wanting to express my self and the anger now.
During the last few years, I have really tried to learn to take things in strides; however, there are some moments that are just too overwhelming to not express. This week, especially today, was not one of those times that I could really easily stay at my normal calm. It just seemed like one bad decision or outcome was compounding onto the next. While I tried my best to allot the correct amount of time to studying for my health psychology final, my attempt to memorize as much as possible for my biochemistry final the same day just required too much time. Even though I had already decided to play grade defense as much as possible, I continued to study for biochemistry far longer than I should have. Even with this increased time allotted to studying for biochemistry, I still felt unprepared as always. After taking my 7:30am biochemistry final, I was just too tired to try and study again, so I napped between my classes, which killed off even more time, that I really should have just toughed out and studied through in hindsight. Of course, hindsight is 20/20, so realistically, I have no clue whether I would have studied the right material, but the chance that I could have deeply saddens me.
After an exhausting day, I took a rest, which ended with my inability to go back to studying for the night. This pushed writing a 10 page extra credit paper (that I ended up skipping in favor of studying for another test), to the day that it was due. After studying for microbiology for several hours, I decided that I should sit down and write the paper, but it just didn't happen. I continuously changed the topic that I wanted to focus on, partially due to research I was finding and partially due to my lack of desire to make any real progress. Regardless, when I finally went to bed at 4am on Wednesday morning, I felt like I was very well prepared for my final. While, I wish I could say that the exam the next morning went smoothly, the truth is that it was far from that. While I think I actually did pretty well on the exam, the circumstances surrounding the test were so stressful.
In the end, I think that this week will be acceptable. While I am already feeling better, thanks to my advisor's dinner for the my research group, I feel like I still have a long road ahead of me for the rest of the week.
So the week's discovery is this. Despite the best planning, life is all about tearing those plans up. Whether it is reality or yourself that tears those plans up, nothing is what you expect it to be.
So for the deeper meaning part of the entry:
This has been one of the worst weeks in quite a while. From a psychological perspective, I should probably wait until the end of the week to write this, after I've had some time to unwind and hang out with friends (end-experience perception, first explained in pain psychology); however, as I sit and fix my friend's computer, I find myself wanting to express my self and the anger now.
During the last few years, I have really tried to learn to take things in strides; however, there are some moments that are just too overwhelming to not express. This week, especially today, was not one of those times that I could really easily stay at my normal calm. It just seemed like one bad decision or outcome was compounding onto the next. While I tried my best to allot the correct amount of time to studying for my health psychology final, my attempt to memorize as much as possible for my biochemistry final the same day just required too much time. Even though I had already decided to play grade defense as much as possible, I continued to study for biochemistry far longer than I should have. Even with this increased time allotted to studying for biochemistry, I still felt unprepared as always. After taking my 7:30am biochemistry final, I was just too tired to try and study again, so I napped between my classes, which killed off even more time, that I really should have just toughed out and studied through in hindsight. Of course, hindsight is 20/20, so realistically, I have no clue whether I would have studied the right material, but the chance that I could have deeply saddens me.
After an exhausting day, I took a rest, which ended with my inability to go back to studying for the night. This pushed writing a 10 page extra credit paper (that I ended up skipping in favor of studying for another test), to the day that it was due. After studying for microbiology for several hours, I decided that I should sit down and write the paper, but it just didn't happen. I continuously changed the topic that I wanted to focus on, partially due to research I was finding and partially due to my lack of desire to make any real progress. Regardless, when I finally went to bed at 4am on Wednesday morning, I felt like I was very well prepared for my final. While, I wish I could say that the exam the next morning went smoothly, the truth is that it was far from that. While I think I actually did pretty well on the exam, the circumstances surrounding the test were so stressful.
In the end, I think that this week will be acceptable. While I am already feeling better, thanks to my advisor's dinner for the my research group, I feel like I still have a long road ahead of me for the rest of the week.
So the week's discovery is this. Despite the best planning, life is all about tearing those plans up. Whether it is reality or yourself that tears those plans up, nothing is what you expect it to be.
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Disappointment
We are constantly preparing for everything we do: school, personal lives, running, work, a musical solo, the list goes on. They say that practice makes perfect. While it definitely does make whatever we're doing easier, it definitely does not guarantee that everything goes right, according to plan or even produces an acceptable result. In light of these defeats, it is so important to consider what went wrong and what went right.
Last week, my club team and I went to the NIRCA Cross Country National Championships. The biggest cross country race of the year for club sports with over 1000 runners total and plenty of quality runners. In the weeks leading up to the race, I fell into a habit of running strong early in the week, only to be overwhelmed by school, work and trying to maintain a group of close friends during the end of the week. My long runs turned into non-existent runs, and my Thursday speed workouts turned into nap time. Looking back, I was thoroughly under prepared for Nationals. Perhaps the only thing that remotely helped me was the rowing class, I had started going to on Fridays.
During the actual race itself, I started strong and felt that I was very consistent pulling through the 5k mark in just over 18 minutes (I'm by no means fast, but I do like to think of myself as not slow). However, the last 3k resulted in a screeching halt as I got progressively slower, eventually walking, feeling sick to the stomach, with cramped abdominal muscles. For the first time in over a year and a half, I walked during a race. While, I ended up running a personal best in the 8k, I can positively say that it was a terrible race for me.
This entire season (summer and fall) has been a a rocky one for me. I set a personal record in both the 5k (early during my marathon training) and a personal record in the 8k. At the same time, I have been plagued by injury (late pull-out of the Columbus) and disappointing races. However, just like in life, the only thing you can do from the highs and lows is to take the lesson out of the journey and try not to make the same mistake again.
Originally posted here.
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